Two Brothers – Author unknown

Once there were two brothers who inherited their father’s land. The brothers divided the land in half and each one farmed his own section. Over time, the older brother married and had six children, while the younger brother never married.

One night, the younger brother lay awake. “It’s not fair that each of us has half the land to farm,” he thought. “My brother has six children to feed and I have none. He should have more grain than I do.”

So that night the younger brother went to his silo, gathered a large bundle of wheat, and climbed the hill that separated the two farms and over to his brother’s farm. Leaving the wheat in his brother’s silo, the younger brother returned home, feeling pleased with himself.

Earlier that very same night, the older brother was also lying awake. “It’s not fair that each of us has half the land to farm,” he thought. “In my old age my wife and I will have our grown children to take care of us, not to mention grandchildren, while my brother will probably have none. He should at least sell more grain from the fields now so he can provide for himself with dignity in his old age.”

So that night, too, he secretly gathered a large bundle of wheat, climbed the hill, left it in his brother’s silo, and returned home, feeling pleased with himself.

The next morning, the younger brother was surprised to see the amount of grain in his barn unchanged. “I must not have taken as much wheat as I thought,” he said, bemused. “Tonight I’ll be sure to take more.”

That very same moment, his older brother was also standing in his barn, musing much the same thoughts.

After night fell, each brother gathered a greater amount of wheat from his barn and in the dark, secretly delivered it to his brother’s barn. The next morning, the brothers were again puzzled and perplexed. “How can I be mistaken?” each one scratched his head. “There’s the same amount of grain here as there was before I cleared the pile for my brother. This is impossible! Tonight I’ll make no mistake – I’ll take the pile down to the very floor. That way I’ll be sure the grain gets delivered to my brother.”

The third night, more determined than ever, each brother gathered a large pile of wheat from his barn, loaded it onto a cart, and slowly pulled his haul through the fields and up the hill to his brother’s barn. At the top of the hill, under the shadow of a moon, each brother noticed a figure in the distance. Who could it be?

When the two brothers recognized the form of the other brother and the load he was pulling behind, they realized what had happened. Without a word, they dropped the ropes to their carts and embraced.

When our kids were young, my friend, Mary, and I would often remark, “It’s all about perception”. Meaning – their perception vs. ours. While we viewed discipline as teaching life lessons, they likely saw it as cruel and unusual punishment. I’ve thought a lot about this lately and how perception fuels much of how we live our lives, both in relation to others and to ourselves.

It’s impossible to know just how someone else (especially a child) is interpreting our words or our actions unless we ask them directly. The tone of our voice might imply something totally contrary to what we intended. Maybe we’re tired or distracted and were just stating a fact, but the other person perceives that we’re angry or annoyed.

The science of Ayurveda is a great place to begin to understand why we all feel things so differently.  A study of the three doshas (vata, pitta and kapha) around which Ayurveda is based, will reveal how we might have a different reaction to the same situation such as a boss making a cutting remark. The vata type would likely be hurt and overly sensitive, but the hurt feelings would soon dissipate. The pitta type might explode in anger (or at least be seething inside). The kapha type would probably “take it” but would never forget it! If you’re curious what your dominant dosha is, here’s an easy quiz you can take.

Since studying Ayurveda, I’ve learned that before I cast judgment on someone’s reaction, I do a quick “dosha assessment” and then usually have an ah-ha moment. My perception invariably changes and any possible misunderstanding tends to evaporate. Imagine how many relationships would be smoother if each person took the time to understand their partner’s unique constitution. I’m not making excuses for bad behavior here, but rather showing how a modification in our perception might change a potentially uncomfortable situation.

Then there’s the perception we have of our self and what’s happening around us that’s out of our control. If we can shift how we look at disappointment in our lives and instead see it as an opportunity for change and growth, we can move forward, instead of staying stuck in old patterns of negativity. A rainy day can go from a “ruined day at the beach” to a glorious chunk of time to burrow in, read a book, watch a good movie or do some clutter control.  Likewise, if we always see ourselves as depressed and stagnant, chances are our perception will become our reality. Sometimes just bringing this into our awareness is enough to help make that shift towards a more positive outlook.

How do you feel perception influences your daily life? I would love to hear your thoughts!

Guest Blog Post: Barbara Sinclair is a visual artist and holistic health coach living in New York City. “Studying energy medicine in Deborah’s 21^st Century Energy Medicine Program has greatly influenced every aspect of my life, both personal and professional.” You can learn more about Barbara and read her blog by visiting her website at https://barbarasinclair.com/.